Darla’s Way Up
Part 1.
As they climed the concrete stairs and unlocked the door to their poorly heated home, Carl and Edith gave a sigh of relief mixed with pain as they welcomed their first child into their home. This was far from what they had planned for her, both out of permanent work and just about making ends meet this wasn’t the dream they had once spoke about as young lover’s many years ago. It had all started going badly when Edith a hardworking, brains of the family became pregnant and much to the horrors of her “perfect” family she wasn’t about to abort her baby. She was quickly ostracised by her whole family and left to fend for herself, the shame on the family wasn’t something you could change over night they believed the damage was done and that was that. Carl’s family were beyond poor so there was no way they could reside there longer than a couple of night’s in the already crammed 2 bedroom apartment.
Edith had struggled throughout most of her pregnancy with only a few hours in a day being good and then came the realisation of reality crashing down on them to give a stern reminder they were struggling in every aspect of life right now. Plenty of cold, hungry nights had become the norm for them a couple times a week. Edith would cry herself to sleep as the hunger churned away at her stomach and her ever growing baby would move around asif wincing from the hunger rumbles.
“Don’t worry my sweet child food will come tomorrow”. She sobbed as she hugged her bump in a loving embrace her heart hurt so much for her child but she wasn’t loosing faith. They would make this work somehow someway, giving their unborn child a chance at life meant they had a chance to get it right. Get all the things that they were struggling to achieve under their belts ensuring a fruitful life with alot less woes than what they were experiencing.
Darla’s first night at home was stressful, frustrating and tiresome to say the least. It was very much a confusing time for all parties concerned, Edith was finding it difficult to breastfeed Darla who insisted on crying instead as Carl looked on helpless and tired written all over his face. She cried, she soiled her nappies (budgeting these were going to be impossible), she threw up on 9 baby suites which were now soaking in the bath, she just wasn’t enjoying being Darla right now.
Her first 6 months were that full of memories and lessons, new ones discovered each day as Darla went from being a new born to a chubby little fuss pot that had to have her way. She would cry her day away if thing’s weren’t as Darla wanted, Carl and Edith found themselves giving into her cries. Even when Carl came back home from his two day a week job at the garage, telling Edith his friend Nigel had advised him to “let the baby cry a while”.
“I’m to do what!?!”, Edith detested in shock.
How on earth could someone just let their baby cry?
Supposed she chocked?
Wouldn’t leaving her to cry make things worse?
She was having none of it and refused to let her baby lie there distressed and upset just because someone with “more experience” said so. The way things were going Edith often felt like lying right next to Darla and crying her eyes out too. They were a month nearly two behind on the rent and nothing seemed to last there was expense after expense and Edith felt like she was drowning in debt. Carl was feeling the strain too, she could see it in his eyes he was trying to be the provider and strong one but his eyes looked so exhausted like he was fighting a fight he was loosing and had no idea how to turn things around.
As she tumbled her way to her first birthday, Darla was now on her feet and keeping her still was an impossible task her exhausted parents had failed at many times, to the point admitting defeat and making her trash their tiny home was much easier. Edith had wanted her daughter to have an extravagant 1st birthday party but their finances could only stretch as far as ingredients for the cake, some party hats, balloons and a few snacks that Edith made clear would be all of Darla’s favourites. Not to mention Darla’s one special gift that literally meant the family would certainly struggle until Carl gets paid next week. It was a simple but precious gift that Darla had wanted and that was a crown, her mommy would always call her “Daralcess” which made her smile and chuckle each time. Edith had picked the prettiest crown she could afford, she knew how much this meant to Darla and herself to just see her smile and wear her crown like the princess she is. Her baby was entitled to pure happiness even if just for one day,it was Darla’s special day and Edith would make it all happen. She even went as far as to do some ironing for 2 local ladies who kindly welcomed her into their home to iron and pack away their laundry. This brought in a few extra pounds that Edith put away for their coming rainy days having treated Darla. Her day was special to her and thats all that mattered to her parents, as they sat next to their daughter as Edith assisted Darla with blowing out her candle, she knelt down and whispered in her daughters ear:
“Make a wish my baby, and wish it to come true”.
By the age of 2 Darla was steady on her feet, certain of herself and as stubborn as they come. Her parents couldn’t shower their little girl with new dolls, dresses and bows but they always made sure she was clean, presentable and happy but again her happiness simply depended on how she woke up that morning. The family were still in their small but comfy home and as the years had gone on they had added to their once small gathering of belongings although their struggles were far from over when it came to paying bills, buying food, and not to mention everything Darla needed weekly. Carl’s two day a week job at the garage had become a full-time job, meaning that Edith had to give up ironing clothes for the community as paying for Darla to go to nursery was impossible and given only 1 and a half days a week free nursery placement, Edith found herself teaching her daughter on their days at home. Carl had offered to ask his boss for an advance but Edith rejected the idea as this would only push the family into further money problems. Darla seemed to really enjoy her time at nursery giving a big smile when her mom dropped her off for the day to play with her little friend’s. Edith would look at the other mothers as they dropped their children off in their big cars, expensive clothes and perfect hair and wondered if they ever had money issues and felt like the whole world was crashing down around you but you have to keep that happy smile painted so thickly on your face so your child doesn’t see or feel what you’re going through. Darla was missing out on those other days at nursery and Edith felt she couldn’t teach her daughter everything the nursery was and it was nowhere as fun when it was just the both of them but she kept the faith in her heart that things would get better and this wasn’t an everlasting struggle.
As she stood looking at the crowd at her christmas school play, 5 year old Darla was nervous and looking for her mommy and daddy. She had secured the role of the shining star in the nativity play and her parent’s had been helping her to rehearse for weeks a few simple lines and angelic twirls as her costume sparkled in the hall for all to see was simple to many but such a big importance to her mommy and daddy. She scanned the room again and her little heart gave a thud of satisfaction there they were! Her mommy and daddy looking happy with broad smiles as they waved and clapped as the opening lines were read. All of her fears were washed away when she saw them, they made her feel complete like she was floating on a cloud of happiness and protection. When she felt poorly her mommy would make her a special warm drink that would make her feel better everytime, that combined with a heap of cuddles and days in blankets with not a care in the world and when daddy came back from work he would come and join them in the blankets even though mommy moaned that he smelt horrible and needed a bath they all lay there happy and together. As the bright light shone on her for the first time with all those curious eyes looking at her, Darla felt all the words she had been learning for so long slip from her memory, she was stuck like a big doll she saw in one of the clothes shops she went to with mommy when she needed a new coat having outgrown her last one. Then she saw daddy making his way to the front.
“Keep looking at me Darla, you can do this”, Carl spoke softly to his daughter hoping his words would give her some encouragement.
Unbeknown to Darla that’s all she had needed, she tiptoed on her tiny little feet. Proud to be here being the big bright star that so many of her friends had wanted to be.
“Follow me”, said Darla’s small little husky voice as the crowd erupting into applause full of appraisal for her courage.
The rest of the play was enjoyable and successful and Darla felt very happy with herself. This was the first time she felt like a big girl, alot of the parents had complimented her acting skills and gave her parents advice on getting their daughter into acting school. This was easier said than done for the mother and father who were just about keeping everything afloat, there were unstoppable streams of bills that needed to be kept up with. Each month there were more and more bills being pushed to the side as it came nearer to Christmas and the parents tried to give their daughter more than they did the year before which seemed to become a reoccurring aim due to the lack of money they had each Christmas. The big day itself was filled with pushing all worries and doubts to the side as they made the effort to make their little girl experience the magic of christmas. With their tiny tree decorated with handmade decorations that Edith and Darla had made on their craft day the family sat and opened gifts that were wrapped in shiny paper that Carl had found in one of the cars he was fixing to sell on it was perfect he had instantly thought when he discovered the rolls. By christmas evening Darla was fast asleep having played christmas angels in the snow with her parents the little girl was all played out. Edith was washing up and her heart was breaking to the point she could no longer keep the tears in as they sprinted down her face catching up with the last tears and splashing into the discoloured dirty dish water. Hands pressed into the bottom of the sink she cried silently as Carl snoozed on their bed, thinking about the day and accepting christmas pudding from her neighbour who must have noticed the lack of sweet smelling baking coming from her home. Edith didn’t want to accept the offering but that would mean Darla going without a sweet treat and that would be worse. Telling her it was a gift from Santa for her being such a good girl at dinner this meant her daughter had another little gift to be happy about, as her heart felt like it was breaking not being able to give her daughter much on a day all her friends would be receiving mounds of gifts, Darla had 3 small little gifts to open 4 including the Christmas pudding. It was the way she had been so grateful for the little she had received, her little eyes shone in excitement as curiosity took her over as she opened them one by one. Edith made her excuses before Darla got to her last present as she couldn’t bare to see her look around for more before the realisation that, that was it reached her. Year after Year it was the same was this all her little girl had to look forward to each year? Little to nothing being put upon her with painted on smiles masked over the pain they both felt?
9 year old Darla had so much confidence and wit about her that people would often think she was much older when they met her. She was a bookworm and always had her head stuck in a book often about acting, Darla certainly made the most of the free book library her school had to offer her. As confident as she seemed on the outside that was simply a comping mechanism she used to shy away from the fact she had no friends at school. Her peers would often leave her out of playtime activites because she didn’t have the lastest shoes, coats, toys ect.
“Why have you still got that coat from last year”, Tommy Crest laughed and pointed. Drawing a crowd as he shouted from the top of his lungs.
“My mom is getting me a new one”, Darla replied back as she tried not to make eye contact with any of the piercing eyes staring at her from head to toe, laughing, whispering and pointing at her asif she was a live freak show.
“You said that last week and the week before!!!”, He laughed.
“You’re just a big poor looser and so is your family”, Snarled Tommy as he and the other children ran off laughing their heads off with not a care for Darla’s feelings whatsoever.
Darla had really had enough and her confidence felt as though it was shattered to the last piece. It wasn’t her fault that her parents couldn’t give her everything that all the other children had, they tried so hard and Darla always made sure to put an extra smile and fuss to show her appreciation for the things she was gifted. She heard the arguments about money every other day when they thought she was sleeping, she heard her mothers failed attempts at silent sobs each night because they had just a morsel each to eat for dinner. Her mother would always make sure to give Darla and her father bigger portions than herself and it was beginning to show in her tiny fragile frame, but she always had a smile on her face that smile though was starting to look weaker and weaker and her cheekbones much more prominent. Darla wished she could help her parents and herself to live a better life. So where she stood on that large concrete playground, the floors etched with now weather damaged pale painted lines the little girl closed her eyes and wished. She wished to be a successful, rich woman one day and she wished to not want for anything. She had a talent and that was acting Darla had no problem getting the main character roles at every play, this would be it she thought the thing to make everything better…..
BUT HOW?
Hard work and determination simply wasn’t enough, her family were poor and couldn’t afford to send her to acting school so this meant the climb to the top was going to be an endless struggle. She’d struggled the little 9 years she had been on this planet yet the realisation was only just settling in of the rocky road her and her parents had ahead.
Her 14th birthday came around and the young teenager and her body were forever changing, Darla always felt annoyed with everything and everyone. Her skin was changing, her body was becoming unrecognisable to her each day she looked in the mirror there was another unwelcome change. To make things worse her best friend that she had only know since she’d started high school was now moving to a private school meaning there was no way they would be seeing each other anytime soon. Tamra was the only best friend that Darla had ever had and now she was moving on, off with the privileged kids who wouldn’t want to even be seen dead with her and her unmatched dated attire but Tamra was different she didn’t care they were best friends not that, that mattered with her moving. Darla had been taking up every chance she could to perform in many plays at her high school, others who were simply jealous as her mom would remind her would used her successes to bully Darla and she had learnt to leave them to it. After all you look very stupid when your shouting and the person meant to be affected doesn’t look bothered at all. Truth is she was very much bothered but there was no way she was going to make the bullies win, from worms in her costumes to hidden stage wigs Darla had been through it all but wasn’t giving up she wanted to make it and there wasn’t anybody about to stop her…………..
As she got home ready to put on a fake smile for her parents and act like she was excited to cut her cake, Darla saw an ambulance parked outside of her home the birthday sash her mother had placed across their front door was now on the floor, trampled and half trailing into her open front door. She was scared to go in and face whatever it was that was awaiting her in there. Who was hurt?
Was it mom?
Was it dad?
Was it both of them?
Darla had a horrible gut feeling that this was going to be something that would change their lives forever. As she got closer to the front door Darla heard a cry that was filled with, horror, pain and devastation that cry belonged to her father….
End Of Part 1, Part 2 coming 28/11/2021
